The bottom line is usually that we want them fixed so we stop reacting to them the way we do. Problem is that we can't make anyone change & it us hard to come to that realization. I kept hoping my H would "get it" or that my "leaving" would shake him into realizing he had to make needed changes. In my case I realized later that he is mentally incapable of changing....so that actually meant.....accept what bothered me all those years or leave. When I could leave....that was the best choice I ever could have made but in my case I didn't miss him in the least & actually felt a peace I had never experienced before in my life which reinforced my understanding that there was nor had there ever been an emotional connection.

It is more difficult when an emotiknal connection exists. you know your reactikns & why. That is important to keep in mind when you question yourself