Due to our fight over his stopping medication and other things related to his depression, my husband left our bed in December. He has been sleeping in a spare bed in our home since then. Several days ago as he was hitting an emotional bottoming out, he suddenly appeared in our bed. I made it clear that he was not welcome. So he left.

Tonite, we had a civil conversation about some relationship things and he asked "so am I allowed to sleep in my bed tonite?" I said yes, on one condition..."that you don't leave it again". He quickly got angry and claimed that leaving it was his "coping mechanism" and that why does he always have to be wrong in his choices? It turned into another one of his rants about how he couldn't possibly be wrong all the time yadda yadda. Again, taking a specific subject and generalizing it into an all encompassing I am out to get him tirade. I responded calmly that I understood that he needs space at times but that this was not acceptable. I am not a yo yo and that I felt manipulated by this particular behavior. I set my boundary. He was furious and stomped off to the other bed again hollering about how there is nothing wrong with his actions. I asked what he felt was accomplished by this. How did his leaving our bed for two months help the situation. His resonse was "It helped me cope".

Soooo....what do you all think? Am I being too hard headed? I want him to respect our marriage and I do not feel this is healthy. It only furthers the chasm building between us.