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Originally Posted by ShadowGX
"Significant other" in this case meaning someone you've been with for long enough that you're sure this is the person for you. You're either married or whatever you've agreed upon as the "end goal" for the relationship, whether that's "just stay together" without marrying or whatever else it might be. You're past all the intro stuff and you're looking to or already have built a life with this person.
If you're comfortable with it, I'm also curious what your diagnosis might be and if you could describe how the relationship progressed for you beyond the initial meeting throughout your mental health issues and when you both decided to stay together.
Also if you're comfortable I'm curious the age you met your significant other and how long you've been together.
Whatever info you can share may be helpful. If you'd rather PM me instead of post publicly that's ok.
I'm writing this in hopes of finding people here who might have had it worse than or similarly as bad as me but still managed to find that special person for them, hence the reason for a stricter requirement on how committed the relationship is. I'm uninterested in casual relationships myself so don't want to base anything off of them. I see a few of you with your diagnosis either in your signature or posted somewhere else and some of those things must be so hard to manage, yet you still managed to find someone. If you can, maybe I can too? I've basically isolated myself IRL because I generally dislike people and how they treat me, so I've been socializing online only. Despite my hobbies being quite similar to guys and getting along really well with them, the good guys are never interested or already claimed - only the wrong ones ever like me. I'm not sad about anyone that I've lost because they've all been wrong for me. I'm just sad that I haven't found anyone to keep and I feel like I never will because what I need doesn't seem to be out there, and when it rarely is it's either already claimed or doesn't feel the same about me.
Side note: I'm not looking for any advice on the matter, just your personal experiences. I'm already doing what I can, I just need hope is all. =\
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Hi.
I've been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, attempted suicides in the past. I have an emotional disconnect and currently relearning things of that realm in therapy. My partner has similar diagnosis but has also been sober from drugs for 5 years as well.
We met on Tinder of all places. I went in thinking it wasn't going to a long term thing because I wasn't in the mindset for a relationship. We were pretty honest about a lot of things on our first date. We played the 30 questions game and I asked difficult questions like "what's the worst thing you've done to someone" and he answered honestly, which took me by surprise. Most people don't like showing negative sides of themselves, so I was intrigued.
I let him know of what I've struggled with and my mental health past. Not all at once, but it was told in the beginning of the relationship.
We're at a year now and having that open line of communication and of our past, it's the strongest relationship I've ever had. There's a level of understanding and compassion, and a desire to get better.
I'm 32, my partner is 27. We've talked about future plans and it's heading in the way we both never thought, especially the avenue we met. I know that a year isn't that long in terms of relationships, but it feels we've been together longer. A weird sense of having known each other for a long time.
He's very patient, as am I. That helps a lot. Since he knows and has an understanding of what I have and am going through, it's been a really supportive relationship. In the past with other people I've been with, the common phrases were "just get over it", "you're being too sensitive," "you're being ridiculous," "your mind is weak," etc.
Dating is hard. Like I stated earlier, I usually go into it thinking it's not going to be a long term relationship and don't expect it to work. I tend to stay honest with what I have and struggle with. Sometimes it makes eliminating asses easier.