I think it was both the experience of reaching out and having her respond in a genuinely kind way every time and also talking about it in session a lot. In session I would usually tell her what I was feeling before I called, how I felt about the conversation, what I imagined she might be feeling (my guess was often inaccurate, as it turns out), etc. So both the experience and processing the experience.


It's still a work in progress for me, but I see now that not everyone thinks I'm a burden or that my feelings are annoying or too much (like my family did). I've always been the kind of person who is happy to help but can't ask for help, and understanding my feelings around asking for extra unscheduled help from my therapist has been really useful for me.