Quote:
Originally Posted by nicoleflynn
Do NOT under any circumstances tell him you are leaving; that will be dangerous. Make your plans in secret. The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans saved my life. I got a divorce after 31 years of verbal and physical abuse. Abusers are excuricatingly insecure and blame you for everything. They are emotional vampires and need you to continually EXPLAIN yourself....as in...I wasn't doing that, etc. STOP explaining. He can't argue with someone who won't respond.walk away from the abuse, or hang up. You can go on-line and read the things you need to do to keep yourself safe...when leaving. He will try to do and say anything to keep you.
Leave without telling him. You owe him nothing,and you owe yourself your life. He will more than likely remain abusive unless he thinks he has a problem and abusers rarely do. Abusers are miserable and take it out on others.
The one sentence that saved me: "Try to let the side of you that is trying to save yourself.....win."
|
Thank you! Unfortunately he knows I am leaving tonight. My mother is going to come with me to get my belongings. I stood up to him yesterday, and he has been in a rage ever since and says he wants me out of the house. It switches from ASAP to 30 days etc. He went on about how because I wanted dressing and peppers for our pizza he had to complain about a waitress that has been serving him for two years and that if I had just kept my F"ING mouth shut we wouldn't be in this situation.
So I am done. I have to save myself from this mental abuse that has been going on in my life. There has been apology after apology but now it's getting to the point where he doesn't say sorry, he just does it and tries to manipulate me into thinking I deserve his treatment. I am entitled to want dressing...
It's basically like he can rage at me, and if I stand up and do the same...
I am a POS who is abusing him. This is the man who screamed at me and tormented me when I had a miscarriage a few months ago because I had started anti anxiety medication and he thinks it caused the MC.