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Originally Posted by SarahSweden
Thanks. Your T seems to be comfortable talking about sex and that´s a good thing. I would probably feel embarrassed if my T talked to me about the meaning of being naked together with another person.
As you, I´d probably gotten some thought about how she might look like naked, especially as she has shown a little to much chest. I don´t find it inappropriate, it more that it can lead to thoughts of a sexual nature.
If your T is rather old, then it might seem not so appealing, it´s a bit like imaging our own parents having sex. As your T has many children, perhaps she's also very open about sex and doesn´t find it strange to talk about.
My T couldn´t have children and I feel sorry for her about that. Not that I pity her but she told her it was a wish she had from an early age and then it´s hard to find someone to love and not being able to have a kid with him.
Have you found an answer to why you have those thoughts about your T?
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I suppose I am lucky that my t is very open about sex. I feel like I can talk to her about anything.
I recently had a smear test and that brought up a lot as I found it very traumatising.
As a straight woman t didn’t really understand at first but then I explained a bit and she was more curious.
Is your t very open about sex? Usually I find that unless you bring it up they usually wait for you to take the lead.
My t is very attractive and I have told her that many times. She really looks after herself and wears very nice dresses which sometimes reveal legs and breasts.
I think it’s absolutely normal to be curious about what’s under those dresses. My t has never shamed me for my thoughts or feelings about her and for that I am very grateful. She is very comfortable with her own sexuality and I am not very comfortable with mine so her normalising it has been very helpful for me.
Would you ever like to have a r/s Sarah?
Perhaps having a discussion with your t could really help you to explore your feelings and the losses that not having a r/s have meant for you!
I haven’t had another r/s after my first serious one and that was 8 years ago! I don’t know if I will ever want another r/s either.
R/s are not straightforward and sexuality is so fluid. I hate the way society has to put labels on boxes on everyone. I think I am coming to terms with my own sexuality because I used to have so much internalised homophobia but now I think well why should I define myself as gay/ straight. Yes I had a r/s with a woman but yes I also dated men in high school. Yes, I love people but I tend to prefer women. Why should I try to put myself into a category because society needs to know how I show my love to others.
I think that deep down there is something I am picking up from my t about her own sexuality. I wonder if she ever questioned it or wanted to explore it. I went to a t once and she told me she was bisexual and had a R/s with a with a woman for years before she got married. I was shocked by her openness. I think there is a very fine line between being open and disclosing too much.