I am grateful that I am still alive.

When I was a teenager, for some reason I did not think I would make it past my high school graduation. Actually, I was wondering if it would happen at all. This was a feeling instead of a thought. I am not saying this because I had poor grades and would flunk out. I am not saying this because I was suicidal. I did not think I would be killed somehow. I just had this feeling that life would just end somehow. There was no logic or rational to this. It is just how I felt.

As probably true with many, I was a bit reckless. My life was in real danger three specific times. One time not of my making. I am very lucky that I lived through those times and ended up making it as far as having a daughter. I am also part of her mother’s family now. I think this is what was missing in my life for a great many years. I am very fortunate. Now I just do not know what is going to happen next.