From H:

"hello dila
i shall answer ur questions because u do deserve to know
i didnt speak to M much, we both were busy and i as you know, am working on two master projects and most of the times unavailable to talk, as much as i wished i could
sometimes after talking to you, M would come to me distressed, unhappy and extremely angry for reasons even he couldnt explain
thats when i tried to help him, trying to teach him anger management and controlling oneself
so i probed more on the topic as to why he was angry all the time, one moment he seemed alright, the next moment, he seemed to blow his lid off completely
eventually, even though we didnt speak much, i was able to make out that he was frightened of you, angry, desperate and terrified of even speaking to you.
this angered me as well, i did not understand why it could trigger something this bad in him, hence i asked him to share a little more context that would allow me to decipher and understand his anguish
he told me some of the conversations that he had with you, things that i came to realize, that you were not the same person that i had met 2 years ago. through somethings that he shared, i understood that you had some sort of profound loathing for me
and u really liked him, romantically or otherwise, i do not know
he on the other hand, thought the opposite, he thought u liked me because u mention me apparently quite a lot, i know abt subtlety, u mention me to trigger a reaction from him
u loathed me dila, this broke me entirely, after really always being ur friend, praying for you- sticking up for you, i do not know if you would even believe it, ive missed sometimes even classes to cheer you up and talk to you, i learnt that u hated me
u shared ever more with him, i understand all of that and i dont mind, u might even have had feelings for him, i do not know
but knowing that u were an entirely different person altogether with him than you were with me, not to mention how u loathed me, it really hurt deep
the truth was i never left you 2 years ago, i simply had a lot more exams and assignments, u always believed that i hurt you, i was hurt tremendously even with that accusation, i was very unhappy
yet i wanted to always reconnect, most days thinking abt you, praying for you, whereever you were, ive made sure to remember your birthdays, even when i dont receive anything back
i was quite alright with all of that tbh, the last conversation that you had with M, he said vaguely abt you rating how much u liked someone, he said you gave me a 5 out of 10, it really struck a nerve to me, i wouldnt have been mad, if you had given me a negative, you gave me something that confirmed what i had suspected all along, ull never ever like me even if i gave it all to you. I tried everything, so in the end, i wanted to break away, since uve already accused me of leaving you, i thought this time, ill do it for real, because for one it didnt have to be a lie, i am hurting you, and i was getting hurt even without speaking to you much. That is why i left
I briefly told M that i wanted to leave and that even goodbye would plunge me into a very dark place, a place i did not want to go, i hadnt been there since my ex. But if you cannot appreciate if people are happy, even after always wanting and praying for your happiness, i am really sorry, i cannot continue it any longer
M was extremely angry himself, for reasons i am not sure, we havent spoken for over a week now, ive been really busy with my assignments, You could try asking him what u asked me. I know the pain of not knowing, hence why i wanted to let you know the reason. It took me an entire week to calm myself, and even go beyond my anguish. If ur wondering if we were happy that we blocked you, its completely wrong. We were literally going through the worst days of our lives blocking you. I personally felt like i lost a long known dear friend, something that i will never recover from. I know that you are good at compartmentalizing your emotions, we arent. You might move on like its nothing, we right from day 1 have not. We blocked you, because there was no other way for us to escape the whirlpool of despair and sadness that were plaguing our minds. For every mail that you sent us, we felt a sadness equal to a 100 times worse. M i think loved you dila, from all that he told me, its something that i could make out, There times even 2 years back, I had profound feelings for you, somethings that you would never understand, those feelings always have been there, making me pray for you, remember all the times that we have had to together, not deleting a single email that u had mailed me. I dont know if you would believe me, maybe you wouldnt, but its alright, ive learnt to accept that you loathe me anyway. I was really affected, heartbroken, when you deliberately tried to get me jealous by mentioning ur relationship with M. I would imagine its the same for him as well.
For all these reasons, Ive decided to move on, to try get past the sadness that forever haunts me, the mails that you sent cursing me for all eternity, as I still to this very day pray for you - something at this point would hold of no value to you. I wouldnt mind if you curse me, but please do not hurt manan, he is very depressed and deeply still cares abt you. If you want you can ur anger at me. I cannot move on like you dila. I do not know if you had feelings that were really genuine for me. Maybe it was all a mask. You did lie to me an awful lot, things I forgave you instantly. But i could not stand that you were entirely a different person to me and another to him. Maybe M might have been affected by this as well. It would take a long while before either of us recover from this. I'll always pray that you too find peace and happiness. May Allah ever bless you and keep you happy"

I do not know how to react to this. They could still have told me a goodbye, or an explanation before leaving. Please share your thoughts. It was horrible what they did to me, and I don't think they can hide behind 'love' as an excuse. Please advice.