I have an alter who can become very suicidal too. She is triggered by some non-specific things and also some very specific things and when triggered out she (used to be) hell bent on completing the act. She would research the means, create the means, set the plan and time, get rid of "evidence" (personal possessions like journals etc) and get all the affairs in order. (This is the determined to die part. No way would she release her grip or let anyone else out to stop her. She had a plan and her destiny was to carry that plan through to its completion). Then she would walk right up to the point of the act itself and -

- switch.

Every single time. And we would have to deal with the destroyed stuff and the given away stuff and all of that. But not be in the least bit suicidal anymore.

I think it must be an internal safety switch. (Either that or this is hell and there IS no escape).

Anyway we've learned not to fear it. It's just like a firefighter part, right? In us we have learned the safety valve exists. We can let that part do her thing, she needs to do it, and we will all feel better once its done. Maybe we just have a lot of faith in that one who switches in as the safety valve. She has our back.