Thread: I said no more
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Old Jun 05, 2018, 02:02 PM
carcrashonrepeat's Avatar
carcrashonrepeat carcrashonrepeat is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 162
Quote:
Originally Posted by SorryShaped View Post
I'm not calling a hotline because I know they'll send someone to take me for an eval, which I'll fail. I don't want to die in a hospital, which I would make certain to happen.
I don't believe in any beings to blame or praise for our choices. I accept my bads, and the small amount of goods.
I really just want to get on my bicycle and disappear. The bills are paid. I don't have to be here or anywhere.
But I won't.
I'll stew in my head and mash the results into the garbage that I already know I am. I want to be able to make it all ok, but I know I can't. I've been listening to that Wilco song, "born to die alone" and it's accurate. I haven't even been crying. I'm becoming very matter of fact about it. I will die alone. I messaged the woman that all this started about to ask if she's ok and to say that I missed my friend
Where do you live that they would do that? Wouldn't they need your address? And could you decline the option for someone to come out to you anyway? They can't do anything against your will. Just say you need to tallk through this particular situation. It doesn't have to go farther than that.
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My heart is down on its knees
And no one is hearing screaming
There's always something that's pulling me down, down, down
And this is nothing new...
- Phantogram

Diagnosed Celiac Disease 2010