Hey,

I have found in the past that most of my depression is situation based, yet this weekend I scared myself, since I felt suicidal for almost no reason at all. I made the choice not to act on those feeling (I'd made a promise to myself to "attempt life" until my 21rst birthday) I'm not on medication since I'd told myself that I'd try everything else first, but I now have tried everything else. I exercise (thought not nearly as much as I should since it's too cold to go walking these days), I socialize with my friends, I go to school (I consider it my equivalent of working, since it will (hopefully) one day lead to a fulfilling career) and I see a therapist. I did not mind (so much) being depressed before since it seemed like a rational reaction to life circumstances, but I don't like this cause it doesn't appear (at least the next day) to be based in reality at all. I don't know, it just scares me.

Laura