Do NOT under any circumstances tell him you are leaving; that will be dangerous. Make your plans in secret. The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans saved my life. I got a divorce after 31 years of verbal and physical abuse. Abusers are excuricatingly insecure and blame you for everything. They are emotional vampires and need you to continually EXPLAIN yourself....as in...I wasn't doing that, etc. STOP explaining. He can't argue with someone who won't respond.walk away from the abuse, or hang up. You can go on-line and read the things you need to do to keep yourself safe...when leaving. He will try to do and say anything to keep you.

Leave without telling him. You owe him nothing,and you owe yourself your life. He will more than likely remain abusive unless he thinks he has a problem and abusers rarely do. Abusers are miserable and take it out on others.

The one sentence that saved me: "Try to let the side of you that is trying to save yourself.....win."