FuzzyBear, I'm so sorry that your therapist said those things to you. That was really unfair (and unkind) of him. I also believe that nobody is "beyond help" - everybody has room and capacity for some improvement. It's unfortunate, but maybe he just didn't have the skills or capacity to be the one to help you?

I don't know how you can determine this earlier though (rather than after spending 8 years of time and money). I wish there were an easier way. I struggle too, I've tried so many therapists and spent so much time and money, and never managed to find someone who was able to actually understand and help. Still trying though.

*hugs*