So what you are saying your host/self had no awareness of Rainy or Thelma and could not have a conversation in your head with her that this is ridiculous we should not behave like this when there is thunder?

I can describe all my parts but I go to battle with them in my head and what I look like to someone on the outside doing battle is me just sitting there or laying on the couch unable to get tasks done or just unable to stand still.

I have parts that help other parts. I have a dark part with all the suicidal intent but that part is young and unable to get the combination of pills for her plan. I have a part that goes on a mission for the dark part and makes the doctors appointment, plays the actress role of being in need of a certain drug, and then getting it. In IFS terms I think it is a manager appeasing the dark part to shut it up and calm it down as it calms down when there is a lethal plan in place.

Host/ self just is compelled to go along with the doctors appointment.

I still do not believe I has OSDD or whatever.