I think if you really look at what it is you keep ruminating about the main theme has to do with lack of respect in each scenario. You have respected and cared about others and these others did not care and respect you back. Your own father did not really respect you either. Truth is you have wanted to be respected by this same kind of individual all your life only the problem with that is this kind of individual is simply not capable of giving that kind of respect. Doesn't matter if it's a boyfriend, your father, a kind of friend, a boss even in every thing you have vented and shared it was always the same kind of person who only cared about you for what you did for them and never had had the ability to respect the things "you" valued and needed and cared about. You have thought that just because someone loves music and to go to concerts that person will actually care about you, WRONG, all that means is that other person loves to go and listen to music and has fun, IT'S ABOUT WHAT THAT PERSON LIKES, not what you like understand? Like that guy that you said was fun and then you watched him stand in front of the mirror ADORING himself while you just sat alone as he was not adoring you now was he? NO, he wanted you to be a part of his own SELF ADMIRATION. Even that somewhat friend that made a pass at your new boyfriend, NOT A TRUE FRIEND, and never can be either, much too self interested to a point where she will just as soon take over your boyfriend even right in front of you as if you don't exist. Pretty much all your vents revolve around this same kind of person NEVER seeing you or appreciating or RESPECTING you.