T today. Not writing up full session in detail because the main topic was something really embarrassing and awkward, and even though this is an anonymous forum, still don't feel comfortable sharing. (I knew we'd be covering this topic because of an e-mail I'd sent him Thursday after session.)
T walked out to get me carrying a stack of coffee mugs to put in kitchen to wash (he has mugs and tea in waiting area). I went back and sat down, he came back and apologized for taking minute to do that. I said was OK and, "Another lovely day, eh?" (it's rainy). He sighed and said "yeah." I said how I'd gotten caught in a bad downpour last night while driving, debated pulling over on highway, but went with driving 30 mph with flashers on. T asked what time that was. I said, and he said, "We were caught in the same storm then, but on [different local highway]. It was pretty bad."

T: "Have you ever gotten caught in a bad storm while outside?" M: "Yeah, one time i can think of I'd been at a baseball game, was walking to [public transportation] and it started storming and hailing. The hail was hitting me on the head." T: "Yikes!" He shared story of being out in "wilderness" and getting stuck in a storm. "Sometimes the rain can be so hard, it hurts." Me: "Yeah it can be." (I think he'd figured out at this point that I was just trying to get comfortable enough with him to discuss the main topic, so he was playing along, sharing stories.)

Me: "So my D had this Letter Parade at her school today that we went to." Talked about that a minute. Awkward pause. T: "So I assume you want to talk about the e-mail you sent." Me: "Yeah...I hope you understand why I sent it. I thought it would be really hard to say in session, and the thought of you sitting here reading a printout seemed worse..." T: "What you did made sense. Basically, you didn't want to see my initial reaction." Me: "Yes, exactly. I wanted you to have already processed it before seeing me."

He asked where I wanted to start. I wasn't sure, mentioned a few different areas we can go in. I asked if he had thoughts. He said he knows he's normally more directive (he is!), but with this, he was trying to let me lead. Me: "Because it's a difficult topic, to make sure I'm comfortable?" T: "Yes." He said one thing that might be good to do is to share with him in person what I'd said in the e-mail. Me: "Uh...Is that to get me more comfortable with it?" T: "Yes, basically." I never really ended up doing that, but did discuss some portions.

Again, not going into details, but it felt like T was really trying to understand. Asking lots of questions, like, "Do you think it's more x or more y? Or maybe some mix of those?" He checked in with me once or twice to make sure I was doing OK. Early on, he said, "We don't have to talk about this any more today than what we already have, it's up to you." I said it was OK, I wanted to keep going (which I did).

At one point, I was reusing a tissue I had to wipe my eyes, and he said (as he's said before), "I buy those by the case, use as many as you like. You don't have to use every available inch of it." I kinda laughed and said I guessed I was doing that out of habit, that it was probably gross, my reusing a tissue. He said wasn't that, he just didn't want me to get an eye infection or anything.

Was near end of session, and I said I knew this was more than a one-session conversation, though I didn't know that it would be like the next 10 sessions or something. T: "If it ends up being that way, that's fine. It's up to you." I mentioned a few other directions that we could take the discussion, including a couple that were pretty much different areas altogether. He said we could talk about them whenever I wanted to, when I was ready. He asked how I felt session had gone. Me: "Well, I managed not to run screaming from the room, and you also didn't run screaming from the room, so good, I guess?" T kinda laughed and said, "I wouldn't run screaming from the room. Nothing you said made me want to do that." Me: "Thanks."

We talked a bit more, and I saw that we were starting to go over time, so I got out my phone to schedule, and he grabbed his. Confirmed Thursday, scheduled for Monday. Went over to pay, as I was talking about school ending and D starting some summer camps the next week. T: "Aw, kids in camp are so cute." Paid, shook hands as he said, "Have a good week." I said "You, too." Then he added, "Stay dry!" I said, "Oh right," and went to grab my umbrella from the couch. It wasn't there. I said, "Hm, maybe I left it in the waiting room?" I turned to leave, as T said, "Take care." Me: "You, too." (Umbrella was on couch where I was sitting in waiting room.)