Some people deal with depression their whole life. It becomes a manner of recognizing the symptoms and developing coping skills. The most important thing is to have some type of support system. This site could be it, a friend, a family member. It has to be someone who understands depression on a certain level. When things get really bad, think of something that can keep you going. For example, your kids need you. It will get better, it's just not last long until your next episode. Also, you may want to consider finding some type of therapy for the abuse and rape. The more you talk things out, the better you feel and the easier it will get to move on.