I don't know how my T looks at me vs. how I do it myself. I tend to have a pretty negative view of myself, though I know that most people see quite the opposite (as in I might think I have to try very hard to get a job, while most people around me seem to have the impression I'm so smart and hard working that it'd be easy for example).

I don't think my T is all good or all bad. He is one of the only people of whom I know he has flaws and I still accept him and think he's a decent person.

However, in the rest of my life I very much split people into good and bad. Splitting is one of the symptoms lots of people with my issue (bpd) have, so it's not surprising. I discuss it in therapy quite frequently and we try to get me to a point where I can see and feel that people can be grey instead of just black or
white.