I’m a bit younger than you, but I too really love a video game character. I feel a bit different (I don’t want kids or a 3D hubby), but I’ll try to be as of much help as possible.

Firstly, I don’t think you should feel so bad about liking him. You’re attracted to him and like him for a reason. Sometimes your feelings aren’t something you can help, so be gentle on yourself. I don't think it's anything you should feel ashamed of. I used to think that no one else liked fictional characters to the intensity that I do, but quite a few people do so you don't have to feel alone in that.

I can understand how it feels to think you’re on a timeline, but that isn’t necessarily true. You say you want to get married and have kids, but 30 is still young. Everything takes time, and if you feel like you aren’t in a place to be in a relationship there’s no need to force anything. Take your time, allow yourself to heal, and figure yourself out. Everyone's different. Some people get married at 18, some at 25, some it takes them a bit longer, and that's all OK! You don't have to pressure yourself

If you want, you can PM me and talk about how you’re feeling. I’m open to listen and talk about it all.