Cinnamon_Roll - Thanks for the extra explanation! That makes sense. And, sounds incredibly difficult and crazy to deal with. I can't imagine a T expecting me to schedule my vacations around their time off . I hope there aren't too many of those types left.

re: Feeling your emotions in T... ugh! I mean, that's great that you're working on it, but I struggle with this too. I just don't feel like I *experience* emotions while in T (other than lots of fear!). And, I keep coming back to it not feeling quite safe enough for me, though I'm not sure what else I need. Hmm... yeah, even just thinking about it, I get a pretty strong "nope!" feeling inside!

Here Today ("if a person lacks the motivation to do the homework -- that seems more to me like something going on in the motivational system of the client that neither the therapy nor their existing coping skills are addressing") - YES. I agree wholeheartedly with this.

I don't think it's the therapist's job to "fix" someone, I don't think a therapist CAN "fix" us - they have to help us fix ourselves. BUT... if therapy isn't working, I DO think it's the therapist's job to acknowledge that, try to figure out why, and help the client address it.

If a client isn't motivated to do the homework - why? Is there an unconscious fear of change (for example, are they afraid that by changing themselves, their spouse might not love them anymore?) Do they have issues with authority and feel like the therapist is stepping on their independence by assigning homework? Is the homework too hard for where they're at and overwhelming? Or too easy, and seen as ridiculously stupid? Is the point of the homework not clear? Do they not trust the therapist enough to try the homework to see what they get from it? Are they overwhelmed by other things in their life, and can't find the time to do homework and meet their basic needs for sleep, food, and a shower?

There's lots of reasons. And the reasons are important... they can help find a way "in" - a way to actually identify what's really going on beneath the surface. (And THAT'S what I think/hope/expect that Ts with psychoanalytic training shine at!)

Thanks!