Yes, consistency. After i had been seeing my latest t for a few years, and taking the bus, which was a new experience for me, noting that the bus schedule did not change, i commented to him how secure the buses made me feel. Boy did he get a pouty face, like what am i, chopped liver? Then i looked at the bigger picture - the bus was consistently bringing me to see him, who was also always there - well, okay, sometimes you DO have to hit me with a ton of bricks. its hard for us to recognize even as it's happening, if youve never seen it before.