Sometimes we all feel weird in a while because none of us is perfect.However, your situation looks a little complex.But the most important thing to inspire you to move forward is having the gift of "life".You can work on your outlook if you think you don't like it.Get closer to any professional physician....
Remember hat you are not living life to impress anyone.Just be yourself.There is someone somewhere who is having the worst kind of low self esteem.You are suffering from inferiority complex and this is curable.You need to control your thoughts.Be positive,do the things you love most.It could be your favorite hobby....avoid friends who make you feel worthless...be happy.