This is my experience too. I was encouraged to develop an attachment but then was often just left to get on with it, when things got tough. I can call him if I'm in crisis but that's it. So when I started to really struggle with the breaks, I was left on my own to try to work it out. He wouldn't even engage in a conversation about coping strategies - of course, he would say that I could have talked about whatever I wanted to, which I tried to do but I really needed a more interaction from him. I needed looking after - not completely... but a bit, and that doesn't seem to be his style. The problem is that it only serves to replay my original attachment trauma. After 9 months of negotiating, he has agreed that I can send an email to him during the break, which he will read but not respond to. What a weird, strange relationship I've gotten myself into... even stranger than my relationship with my actual parents!