Quote:
Originally Posted by continuosly blue
I don’t mean to be insensitive but I have found that the minute you estimate your value on whether you find this “ perfect love “ your doomed. Why ? Because you feel you are worthless if your not living life the way you see others living it. I believe love finds you , you don’t find love. The circumstances that create that original attraction is a snapshot in time. It won’t happen again.
Many people value themselves as individuals , live alone and live extraordinary lives. Is being married and having kids the only thing that can make you happy ?
50% of marriages end in divorce. Love can turn to hate very quickly. You have numerous advantages and gifts , personally. First you have to have some feeling of self worth. Self esteem. No matter what you look like or whatever you compare yourself to. Find yourself first. Blossom. Then love will find you.
And not necessarily in the form of a man.
I wish you the best.
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The op is from a different culture where marriage is important and considered part of a woman's life. I live in Japan where some women are still taught to find their prince in shining armor and marry to have children still. Not all women are taught this of course, but the culture is different and values are different. I'm from America and totally understand your opinion about finding self-worth from within, not from a man or another person. But, this is a cultural perspective which is taught by society or by one's upbringing. Thus, I would not be so harsh about judging the op and her desire to find the right man to get married. It is about cultural values and society's norms. I totally agree with your opinion, but, at the same time, understand the op's angst about not finding her perfect love.