I have to get this off my chest. My boyfriend is absolutely, hands down amazing and wonderful... BUT..... today... he did something that upset me.

I love the band, Phish, and so does he. Phish is HUGE and well known among Deadheads/hippies. My boyfriend has seen 99 Phish shows. I have seen like 25???

So Phish does these once in a while, every few years (?) 3-day camping/music festivals. I haven't gone to one in about 15 years???? My boyfriend has gone to nearly all of them (I think)?

Anyways, he's a FAR bigger fan than I am and has a TON of friends who also go to all these shows together. It's a big, enormously fun event that he absolutely loves.

I could do without the 3-day camping festival at this age... but for him, I would do it again.

Thing is, we can't go to the festival this summer because of me, my new job and finances...... I have other priorities financially, we would have to buy all the equipment we would need to camp (and I don't want to spend that money right now, and he doesn't have it himself), and I don't even know if I can take a day off that soon in my new job, or if I will have even earned a day off by then.

He has belabored over being upset that we cannot go, every single time it comes up with our friends.

Well, today he tells me that he is sad we're not going, that it's the first time he hasn't seen Phish in a whole year, that all his good pals are going, that they are sad we're not going, that Phish has been a huge part of his life etc etc, and well, after hearing this over and over again, I finally got upset.

I told him he needs to either go without me or drop the subject altogether. He refuses to go without me so he's opting not to go.

But now I am left feeling super upset and massively guilty over him not being able to go because of me... and mad at him for belaboring over something that to me, should not be a big deal -- but it is to him, and I need to understand and respect his feelings.

I am also very annoyed that he dumped all his feelings about it on me, when I already knew he was upset about not going, and when I already felt bad about it.

He is a great guy, who is normally very sensitive to my feelings.

I guess I am simply just venting, but I am still upset & feel very down spirited because it's all my fault we cannot go, and I know he's going to continue to quietly be upset about it. I wish he had never brought it up to me today and I wish he had just kept it to himself.