That's where imagination comes in. We tend to imagine the rest of the missing information, we create a mental model of the person and try to fit the existing information into it. And if new information doesn't fit into our mental model, we try to make excuses and try to make it fit (e.g. he was charged with domestic violence because it was self defence against his monster girlfriend).

Esmme, I think your friends and family are right. In your excuse - it is perfectly normal to long for a soulmate. However, the cold facts about the man suggest that he is unfit to be your soulmate. Think how much of his image in your head is based on your real observations and how much of it was imagined. It's difficult to take other people's words for it, but once you start coming to your own conclusions it will get easier.