Had a great day today. Unexpectedly got to see NV again. It’s rare I get to see him twice In one week. All we did was take a nap which I know sounds lame but it feels so good to sleep next to someone after so many years of sleeping alone. Now that he has his own room he’s renting I may be able to spend the occasional night there, so that’ll be nice too. As of right now we haven’t been able to do that bc my son comes in my bed every night and NV lives with his aunt who won’t allow him to bring girls into the house because of his young cousins. Yeah we’re losers I know. But he’s getting out. My only concern is he’s moving into the city and I’m a bit afraid of the city, although he’s not moving into a particularly violent area. But still, it’s pretty deep in there. I hope I will be safe. I have no worries for him, he grew up in Brooklyn so he knows how to handle himself. I am a typical suburbanite though.

I’m getting soooo upset with the state of this house. I’m really going to try harder to make it nice looking. I kind of gave up cleaning for awhile because it’s so discouraging to clean all the time and feel like nothing is actually getting cleaned. Like it looks horrible no matter what I do so why bother? I hate living here. I wish I could find a job. I wish I didn’t have to give up teaching. That would have made things so much easier on me, at least financially. But my mental health is more important than money. What good is money going to do me if I’m hospitalized every six months in a breakdown?

My prescription COBRA coverage still hasn’t come through so I don’t know what happened with that. The letter said I had until July 31st to elect and I elected on like June 4 and sent a check. The check hasn’t been taken out of my account and my insurance hasn’t been reinstated. So right now I’m paying out of pocket. I’m using GoodRx and hopefully will be able to keep the total cost under $200. I won’t be able to get my son his inhaler though. But the doctor said he only “might” have asthma and probably doesn’t even need one, and I still have his rescue inhaler if he does start coughing a lot. Obviously if it was a necessity I would find a way to pay for it but it’s not. It’s horrible that an inhaler costs $250 per month though. And that my meds will likely cost that as well, even using the GoodRx coupons. And the fact that they’re generic, you would think they’re cheap but not at my pharmacy. I’m going to try to find a different pharmacy where they might be cheaper.

I took my son to the carnival today and spent a lot of money there but it was for one night of fun. I figure we have to have fun sometimes. He wanted to go to the water park on Sunday but I said I just spent a bunch of money at the carnival and we would have to wait on the water park. I should be getting my first unemployment payment soon. I got notice that it was approved. So hopefully that comes through.