I think that the concern about upping the dose is that one will eventually become tolerant to that (as one has become tolerant to the present dose) and then one will want to up the dose again... And so on.

Withdrawal from benzos is not pretty. I know of a number of inpatient drug treatment facilities that WILL NOT take patients who are trying to cease taking benzos until they have been off them for 3 months. How come? Because those patients are harder to deal with than the patients who are coming off of opiates. The psychological withdrawal syndrome from benzos can be INTENSE.

A low dose of an anti-psychotic (such as seroquel or largactil / chlorpromazine PRN) could help by sedating you slightly (which reduces the physical symptoms of anxiety). There is typically no problem with ceasing those - nowhere near the problem with benzo's at any rate.

I know you said you had a paradoxical reaction to SSRI's - but anti-p's are a different class of drug.