Wow, from all you've said, it does not sound like she was ever a friend. She sounds like a user who was maybe a fun person to be around, but not a friend. I know plenty of people who are fun to be around but they are terrible at any kind of relationship, including friendship.

She definitely is gaslighting you. Yeah, you've gone back and forth about the divorce, but it's a major decision. A friend should be supportive. It's not like your divorce or marriage affects her personally.

I'm confused because I know I've seen in other threads where you've asked if you maybe do have a PD, so I don't know if that's something that you shared with her, but, wow, people can be assholes when they get in their head that you have some disorder or another. My dad tells everyone I have bipolar. I do not. Numerous psychiatrists and psychologists have confirmed that there is no bipolar. He tells people I have bipolar so he doesn't have to admit that I was abused and have PTSD, from his abuse. Maybe her accusation of BPD (and why should a diagnosis be an accusation? do you accuse people of having cancer? geez) is to make her feel better about her behavior or something? Like if she can blame your emotions/choices on your BPD, then it absolves her of her bad behavior towards you (which is really the reason for your emotions/choices)?

Sometimes we remain friends with people because of familiarity, not because of true friendship. Sounds like that might be the case. I would not have expected her to apologize after what you said to her about her mouth. That probably just fueled her fire, but it also does not sound like there was anything to salvage.

Take the trash out. Good riddance. Sounds like she was all drama.

Seesaw