When I was abused I did everything in my power to hide it and to pretend that everything was fine during it - I didn't believe anything I went through was legitimate and thought I was being selfish or dramatic when I even approached the idea. This caused me to stay in the same situations longer, and become more hurt by everything.

If you experience pain you should acknowledge it. Talking about it is the first step to getting help.

Your problems are very real, and it sounds like you've been hurt a lot. Even if she has an illness, it doesn't invalidate the pain she's caused you and she isn't absolved of responsibility. I'm sorry you're going through this, I hope you can feel better soon, and I think therapy would be very helpful.