you hang in there for yourself, because the future will not even resemble what you are going through now. What I mean is, throw yourself into activities that you like or would love or always wanted to try, like volunteer at a hospital a few hrs. a week, or anyplace he will not be, and enjoy your life there.

Make friends and pick good people who are supportive of your situation and can help you if you need them in the future.
By being supportive towards others, I found, support will show up when you need it most.

By beginning a new journey for yourself, you will find out your strengths and also available positions you could fill that you cannot see from the relationship that is clouding your view and eroding your self-esteem.

You will leave when you are good and ready, meanwhile you can make a plan, and begin living the life you would if he weren't an irresponsible drunk.

If you leave that mind-set at home, and go out into the world to do your best to help yourself, believe me, things you haven't been able to see that will help your life and advance it will become illuminated.

It will work out for you.
Trust yourself.
nightbird