I know for me I had lousy T's for 13 years & no real support network though my mom let me come back when things got bad at home but then the stress of staying her was bad in a different way than with my H....only time I felt like I got any support was when I was in the medical or mental hospitals. I was in & out a lot during those 13 years.

Fast forward.....a move 2100 miles away to where I knew no one. Found an awesome T who taught DBT. I learned & worked hard for an intense 2 years & went inspite of having a compression fracture in my back for the first 6 months. T didn't just magically work.....it took a lot of hard work. I had met a few people who I had become friends with & found a community that actually was very supportive of each other even the "new kid on the block(or on my farm)". I do believe from experience that having supportive people in one's life is critical. I am a very independent person who has always been an "I can do it myself" kind of person but this move was very humbling & I came to KNOW that there are times I need help & times I give help to others. This community comes together & it has made me see just how critical good support is in the healing process.

I had tons of baggage I moved with. PTSD, anorexia, depression, anxiety.....but for me getting away from the bad environment I was in in my marriage was the first door opened so I could start healing & learning who I really was without having to live around the bad stuff 24/7.

My first PDOC gave up on me when I kept attempting suicide with many close times. No other help worked either during those 13 years. Everyone felt there was no hope....it was my last hope to leave & I had no idea it would make such a powerful pisitive impact on my life because everyone had always told me "you can't run away from your problems".....that may be true in many cases but there are times it does work....& that was the only time I was finally in a place where help worked. I finally was able to put energy into my healing instead of full time energy fighting my environment. Sometimes we don't even see how bad the environment has been until we are out of it & can look back objectively instead of being totally emotionally involved.

Just some thoughts from my own experience of feelibg no hope for 13 years.....after I had a break down.