TexSinginMom,

I think that there's been a communication problem here, I didn't mean to imply YOU were frustrated, I meant that SHE was frustrated, all of those hormones running through her body that she's not familiar with causing emotions she doesn't know how to deal with then add the ADHD and bipolar... Even though she's acting out, and I fully agree that she's got to behave, I still feel for her. Being a teenager is hard, and I wouldn't go back and go through them again for anything!

I have a 14 year old twins. One of them struggles with anger issues. It's a problem that we've been working on for years. Once in a while he'll back slide, have a bad day at school, come home and something minor will set him off. When he gets like that the best thing that I've found to do is let him explode without reacting to difuse the situation. Granted, he's got to do the exploding in his room, but once he calms down we discuss it. We first try to figure out where he lost control, and what he could possibly do in the future not to get to that point. Then we discuss and appropriate punishment.

This whole situation is very difficult for my husband. He'd much rather react instantly to the situation, but as long as the boy is in his room and not hurting himself or anyone else I say let him blow. He's at a point that you can't do or say anything to difuse the situation, only make it worse.

The method we're using seems to work his outbursts are fewer and far between and we can see that he's actually trying to calm himself down when something happens that would have in the past sent him over the edge.

I'm really sorry for the misunderstanding. I really did not mean to imply that you frustrated and reacting.