I think the only way you can know who God is for yourself is to start a conversation with Him. "Yo, God, you there?" :-) He will show up for you or He won't but I'll bet on Will. It can feel silly, feel like you are talking to the air or space inside your head or something but your thoughts and feelings and the situations around you will coalesce into a Person that has meaning for You. You'll pick up books that speak of Him, think of Him at odd occasions where you wouldn't have before and feel like there's a "method to the madness" around you.

Nothing at all to lose trying it out. Start an honest conversation.