I see, sorry I didn't have much info on your state brother, yes! Keep that positivity flowing until you get admitted to the facility. At any sign of depression call a friend, trust me that's what I do it's not a burden. I lived with the voices for years arguing back and forth not wanting to let me sleep. Now my delusions shifted to people in real life talking about me. normally they kind of got in control, they are part of me, instead of having a argument with the voices, i interorize them as me. Kind of a alter ego. Just shared this so you can feel better. There is treatment, medication and therapy to help us. Stick around, post, or just youtube music. Hope you feel relaxed. Oh and use that energy to good use.
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Originally Posted by Só leigheas
Not gonna lie, I've gotten more "positive" every time I've had a full breakdown. My hallucinations are pretty constant today and I had more nightmares last night. I'd like to think I'm flipping these creatures and voices off by not doing what they want. They want me to die and I do, too, but I have this quote in my head right now and I keep saying it to myself, "Maybe I'm just falling to get somewhere they won't" -Mike Shinoda, 'Watching As I Fall'. I've been falling for a long time now and I still am. For the first time in a long time, I actually want to catch myself. I'm at this point where I can either let this kill me or I can let this kill a part of me and learn to live. I still have my T on speed dial and friends who are ready to take me into the hospital at a moment's notice. I know I can't trust my brain right now, so I'm reality checking with them. I'm doing all of this until I can get into a facility (hopefully I can) because I really don't want to be completely delusional again. I don't know how I survived last time.
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