There are times when you can choose to go to the hospital and times when you don't have a choice. Often, it is inconvenient. Often, it's an expense we can't afford. Sometimes, we just don't have control. Bipolar is a valid medical condition like all others, can even come with a higher cost because of the risk of attempted suicide.

I had no choice but to go to the hospital when I got a perforated ulcer, ambulance, had emergency surgery, a 6 day stay, expensive followup stuff afterwards. Was it convenient? No. Would I have planned to go if I had known I had an ulcer? No. Could we afford it? No. Did I need it? Yes. Bottom line.

You need it too. I don't want to offend you either, but it sounds to me like you are making excuses to avoid getting the help you need. Why is that? You are a valuable person. It sounds like your husband loves you to pieces. You need to start loving and taking care of yourself.