I don't even know. It would help if I had a supportive living environment but that's apparently too much to ask...

the mother doesn't want to hear about me being in pain, ever, and instead insists on demanding that I do ever single physical task that she doesn't want to do, including getting her own soda or putting away her own food and dishes if I am home. She is not incapable. She's just a lazy narcissist who chooses to hold the fact that I have nowhere else to go over my head. That's not helping the depression.

The pain isn't helping the depression. Being subpoenaed to court for an incident that happened in September (as a witness) isn't helping anything, nor is lack of sleep. Being diagnosed diabetic isn't helping anything either. Everything is getting thrown at me all at once. I can't... I just can't anymore...

I have a sleep study Thursday night because the neuro wants to see if there is any reason my sleep is so messed up. I'm just so tired and so overwhelmed at this point, it's not even worth the effort it seems to keep trying to get ahead of the problem.

I'm having a bit of a "why me" moment, and have been for a week or so honestly... and it seems like nobody irl wants to even listen except the people that get paid to listen. My friends (if you can even call them that at this point) don't really seem to care anymore. I would just hide in my house if it didn't mean being around the mother all the time.

Sorry... that was probably more than you were bargaining for, Gus...