freewill,

I don't know your son. But, maybe, he is like some members of my own family and some friends. They just don't want to look into the face of my pain. They don't have it in them. It's not really that they don't care. It's more like taking the horrific stories off a newspaper page and making the stories all too real for them. It's easy to read about it -- abuse, inhumanity -- in the newspaper, because when it feels like too much, they can just turn the page. Can't do that when looking into someone eyes. So they try not to look.

My brother was like this. It took him several years after I disclosed my abuse to come around, to really look into my eyes. But he did. Like him, your son might just not be ready.

But, again, I don't know your son. I dont' profess to know all the answers. Regardless, I really encourage you not to look at today as if you have failed in raising your son. Life's experiences, more than what we are told, teaches us compassion. You son may just need to live some more of life to develop that. Your example -- your strength -- will continue to matter to how he sees the world, even if he doesn't speak of it. Your role in his life is not over. You matter, and your recovery will continue to matter.

be well,

mtd