I went through a few years that I remember feeling good but sleeping from 11 pm to 4 AM every night. I spent the early morning hours sewing and doing things I enjoyed. I had a long commute through part of this and I don't remember it being a problem.

When I saw my therapist the other day he mentioned that time and how hard it was on me. He's said that before and I've responded with my memory. This time he just looked at me and said "you don't remember that at all, do you?". I said no and said a bit of what I remember. He just very gently said he is glad I don't remember.

I keep thinking about this. I'm glad that if it was bad that I don't remember as I like thinking I ended work on a positive note mentally (I went off work for surgery and then my bipolar went wild and I never was able to go back).

But it is weird not knowing.