So maybe I'm doing better? I'm still SUI and want to SI but it's not like graphic pictures flashing in my head like before. Does that make any sense? maybe I'm just trying to get out of going to IP? It's not as much I have to do this now. Just ah, I should do x.

I got my sister to graduate her son. So he can get financial aid and start college in the fall. She feels she's being so nice but really she's being a *****. I can't tell her because she'll view me as taking his side. Plus I shouldn't judge because I've never been in her situation. I helped her get everything straightened out to start classes. So we thought but turns out she didn't take the entrance test needed to sign up for classes. So now we have to go back.

The good news: Miguel's June SAT scores came in. He scored a 1230 which means he has the lower scholarship our state offers. So 75% of his tuition to a 4-year state university is paid as long as he maintains a 2.5 gpa. He's going to try again to get the higher scholarship (100% + $600 a year) and into his dream school.

I know it would be bad for everyone if I wasn't here and that I am loved but I feel it's unfair that I have to suffer for their well being.