DISCLAIMER: due to the graphic nature of this post, viewer discretion is advised. i also apologize in advance for my rudeness.... please beware of manic *****es.

ya, i have been taking this depakote as prescribed... its been 3 days now.
just for the record, all the meds i take are prescribed, and i always follow the directions. is it so bad that i visit a different doctor every time in order to get the maximum amount and variety of meds possible?! i dont even see a psychiatrist, but i still have more psych meds from doctor hopping than any crazy person i know. so frankly it is %#@&#! hard to just take only one god damn med every freakin day!

i just feel like venting so here i go...
the depakote is making me very tired. i want to sleep all day but i cant cuz i have to work. i drive an hour and a half to get to work in the morning and its hard to avoid intentionally driving into the center divider. yes i said INTENTIONALLY. did i stu stu stutter?

the sky is pretty and all that wonderful %#@&#! but i do not feel normal. i am even *****yer than ever and would seriously love to hurt someone right now.
i know what youre gonna say, "can you talk to your therapist..." I DONT HAVE A THERAPIST!!! so no, i cant.

is depakote supposed to aggravate my mania?
well if that is the case why should i take it at all?? i flushed the first bottle of depakote down the toilet! okay fine, i swallowed the whole bottle and then barfed it up one minute later, but same thing right?? it was only 28 pills. lmao...
so i ordered a refill on the phone. its automated. thats way too easy. thats how ive been flyin under the radar this whole past year and still getting whatever med i want. those doctors are retarded. well, it is Kaiser so what do you expect?
so here i am, trying to stick with it. self medication without medical supervision is a problem, i know that.
what do you expect from me? you expect a bipolar to make good decisions?? hahaha.
%#@&#! you.