Jello,

I'm not sure what exactly he says to you or what you really want. But, are there some neutral statements that you can think of to say to reaffirm your desire to stand firm and protect yourself without igniting him.

Maybe:
* I'd like to be in a position to help you, but I not able to at this point.
* I care for you, but our relationship has changed. I am no longer able to help you in that way. Or I am not willing to do that. Or ____ is not possible now. Or you cannot stay here anymore.
* I see you are trying, thank you. but I'm not willing to go back
* I need to take care of my self right now
* I don't want to commit to another visit at this point.
* Thanks for wanting to come to my graduation. I know you are proud of me, but I think its best if you show your support in some other way. My graduation is a celebration of my personal achievement, I want to be able to focus on myself and enjoying the events of the day.
* I think it is in both of our best interests if you stop calling/visiting me
* What we had, no longer exists, we both need to move toward separately