I am sorry for your loss.

My grandpa (mom's father) committed suicide in the late 1950s, before I was born, and the teaching of the church then was such as you described, that my mom has spent the rest of her life believing her father went to hell. He wasn't allowed to be buried in a Catholic cemetery, either.

Whatever you think of Vatican II (1962-65), at least it eased up on that one a bit and became a little more kind and loving.

Hugs, if OK. Please PM me if you'd like to talk.

Candy