I think it stems from the fact that I’ve never really had anybody that close in my life. My life has always been a series of acquaintances. And yes I have tried on occasion to change that - not very hard though. I guess I’ve sort of given up because I don’t have the energy I used to have and I’m just comfortable alone. Acquaintances have always had a more important voice than they should - I was never a person who was lucky enough to have support and could just shrug off any flippant response. This is an ability I never acquired and I’m so easily wounded even at this late date. I’m also tired of rehashing my situation. Thanks....