That sounds really hard but she sounds lovely and like she's dealing with it really well. Sending you lots of hugs. Don't really have any great advise. I think you'll just have to let yourself grieve. It's a loss of a lovely, important relationship in your life and you should be able to grieve it. I hope this new therapist will be someone who will be able to form a supportive, warm and productive relationship with you that will take you to the place with yourself you'd like to be in.