Right....what is it that you really like from someone when you do one of your things for attention? Is it the soft caring voice or the way they might take control of the situation or is it that all your responsibilities are put on hold like school, work, chores, for the time being?

You can say to that person. "I really like it when you comfort me. It makes me feel I matter and am important."

I am learning how to lay the ground work on how to get my needs met from my husband from my therapist and he said when he does something that satisfied a need like laying down with me to watch TV, say the words of what you like and how it makes you feel because people can be emotional dumb dumbs and not really know what you need.