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Originally Posted by Myrto
What I was trying to say is that therapy in its essence makes people dependent. It doesn't matter whether you're a "good" or "bad" therapist.
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Don't buy it. It obviously happens, but to claim therapy is synonymous with dependence is a huge, unsubstantiated claim. I've had six therapists over my lifetime, some good, some bad, but none of them encouraged dependence. If anything, they've encouraged my independence.
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...in order to do that, they encourage attachment, consciouly or unconsciously. It's all on their websites. So it's no surprise that so many people feel abandoned after having been fed this illusion of a perfectly attuned person who cares *so much* about you and then boom! the therapist moves away/retires or simply grows tired and it's bye bye. And a lot of therapists are not clear about this: either because they lack self-awareness (pretty ironic) or because (more likely) it feeds their ego.
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As I've said, some therapists are unethical. If you tell a client you will always be there, you are unethical.
And who's the client most likely to show up on this forum? The person with a fabulous therapist who found counselling helpful and is now living a better life? The one who found it useless and moved on?
Or the person who had a run in with an unethical therapist?
Think of when you fill out customer survey cards at restaurants. When do you fill them out? During your run of the mill meal? Or is it when you've had a really good or really bad experience?
Same concept applies to this forum.
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But it's always interesting to me how people dismiss this forum as not being representative. How would you know?
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I don't, but the likelihood is it's not. Only about 12% of therapy goers attend therapy for more than 20 sessions. I don't think that's the makeup of this forum - - I'd put good money on most people here having attended therapy for more than five months.
I don't really know what to say if you think this forum is representative, except to read up on selection and response bias.