Getting away from ED thoughts is so hard when obesity is such an obvious epidemic around you. I went grocery shopping today. The store was crowded with tons of people, maybe 10-15% of them not highly obese, and half of those children. I hate it when it's so in your face.

Then, if I see someone (particularly another woman) who is not overweight, I'll compare myself to them, and I'm happy if I'm thinner and disappointed with myself if I'm not. It's not a competition, for crying out loud! I've always been that way though. That's why I had to stop going to eating disorder support groups. I made everything into a competition with the other people there.

Sigh...some days are worse than others. I wish I could get rid of all ED thoughts once and for all, but I don't know if that will ever happen. I had issues with my body image all through high school, my eating disorder started in college, around the time I was 19. I'm 40 now and STILL I get those thoughts. Sometimes more frequent than others, occasional relapses, really don't need to head into another one of those now.