Hi bosley.........
You must feeling alot of pain right now so please don't add to it by feeling ashamed. You've achieved 6 months once and I'm sure you will again, in you're own time and when you're ready. You really having nothing to be ashamed of, just take one day at a time and do anything you can to take care of yourself right now.
Will be thinking of you and sending special thoughts your way
(((((((hugs))))))))
anyone
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