There were a number of misunderstandings and misinterpretations (on both sides) with my therapist, which was a large contributing factor to terminating. It was so frustrating— for both of us, I’m sure.

I think misunderstandings are avoidable, but they can be quite easy to stumble upon regardless of the effort to understand another. T raised her voice a couple of times to defend herself, and they were justified moments, really. But lashing out on a client out of context? If a therapist does that, they have their own work to do outside of that session.

When I’d be stuck in feeling misunderstood and try to explain myself, my therapist would say, “Use your words.” I wanted to say, “We wouldn’t be in this position if you’d use your head and try to actually understand me!”